New Delhi:Rajeev Mishra was the highest scorer in the junior hockey World Cup in 1998. A flashy talented player distinctive in his del piero shirts and colourful bandanas was said to be the future of Indian hockey. Now that dream is all over, following a knee injury. "After my injury I prefer to stay alone. I have become irritable and hate the fact that no doctor has been able to fix my knee. Even if the injury had happened two years later, I could have had time to prove myself," says Mishra. The worst was not that his career was cut short, but the indifference of the entire hockey fraternity and the federation. "Is there nobody in my own country who can help and get my knee fixed. Even the federation I have played for have abandoned me. Wasn't it their duty to ensure a proper treatment for me," says Mishra, former hockey player. The despair and anger have even forced the player into alcohol abuse. "Initially, I used to drink a lot practically the whole day but now its down to two or three pegs at night. I don't spend time with friends, I just want to be left all alone," he adds.