London:Annoyed with speculations that his Indian Premier League stint is to be blamed for his Achilles injury, England batsman Kevin Pietersen said all such reports are "rubbish" and no one knows how the problem got aggravated.
"The stupid thing is that nobody truly knows what caused it. I've read all the stuff about me aggravating it out in South Africa when I ran on the beach during the IPL but that's rubbish," an angry Pietersen wrote in 'The News of the World'.
Reacting to reports that he went against England and Wales Cricket Board's instructions not to jog while training during the IPL, Pietersen said there were no such orders from the ECB.
"I played the next day in Durban and there was no problem at all. I certainly wasn't under any instruction not to jog.
Yes, I love running, that's more my thing than the gym. I prefer to hit the treadmill or the roads because I can just lose myself and get my head straight through the miles, but this is more a wear and tear injury than caused by running," he said.
Having to sit out of the Ashes after the injury led to a surgery, Pietersen said this "mental torture" was harder to handle than the excruciating physical pain in one of the lowest phases of his life.
"I was lying flat on my back, excruciating pain shooting through my leg and feeling as low as I've felt in my life. And the thought struck me...I'll be damn glad to see the back of 2009!" Pietersen said.
"At the moment all I'm feeling is low, low, low. The pain from my Achilles operation is still ridiculously bad. On Friday I was in so much agony I had to call the England medical team and ask them to come and give me something to combat it.
"Yet whatever the physical pain, it's nothing compared to the mental torture of the past week. To be out of an Ashes series is terrible, so bad I can hardly put it into words," he wrote.
Pietersen said he could not recall a worse phase in his life and even an optimistic attitude hasn't helped.
"I've never known a year like it. From losing the England captaincy six months ago and everything that went with it, through to today when all I'm thinking of doing is walking for the first time in five days when I should be facing Australia at Edgbaston this week," he said.
"People who know me will tell you I'm one of life's optimists. I try and bounce back from adversity as quickly as possible. Not this time, though," he said.